Tag Archives: #hope
This is it!
This Is Is
In the immortal words of Michael Jackson; This Is It. I don’t know why my transfers always have musical references, they just do. Last time it was OK-Go.
Actually, I think OK-Go, Here It Goes Again is the anthem of all woman doing transfers, IUIs or a two week wait of any sort. Probably not what they were thinking when they wrote the song and climbed on their treadmills, but there you have it.
This Is It is much better suited this time. Because I have no tubes. really, this is it. If this doesn’t work, there are no more chances.
I guess I’m lucky in that I’m not going to be tortured month in and month out wondering and waiting and hoping. There is no more hope and I can move on to bigger and better things.
What ever those would be.
I’m also so very lucky to have scored an out of the park home run with my very first cycle that brought us Monkey. No matter what happens in the next 10 days, I still have my Monkey.
Filed under Trying To Breed
Dare to Hope
I dare you to Hope. Muther Fucker.
For some reason, I am suddenly hopeful. I don’t know why. Maybe it was the thinking I had a cyst and getting mentally prepared to have the cycle cancelled. Maybe it was finding out the my lining was at 12 (muther. fucker. 12!!). Or maybe it’s just a case of the crazies setting in.
Probably the later.
But I do feel hopeful. For the first time in ages. This is our last cycle with our last three little snowbabies. Surely. Out of all those embryos, there has to be one good one. Surely… its one of these three.
The three Musketeers.
Transfer is set for next Monday. Beta is scheduled for Feb 8th – which is the Mr’s birthday. SURELY I couldn’t get a BFN on his birthday.
*Hopes comes crashing down.*
After all. I’m the girl who found out I had a Zombie Fetus on Halloween. The gods, they are always a laughing at me.
Filed under Random Fluffy Bits
Hope…?
hope?
If you tuned in to read about something naughty, you can stop reading now. I would say come back in a week. Maybe two. It’s sorta sucky here in DCG Land.
I’m still waiting, the worst wait possible. With the two week wait there is hope. Even if things didn’t go perfectly, there is always a possibility that it will work and you will end up pregnant. In the two week wait between a BFP and your fist ultrasound, there is tons of hope, nervous hope, as you wonder if it will be one, or two healthy heart beats. There is a chance there will be no heart beat… but statistically speaking (fucking statistics) you have your BFP and you will see something growing in there. In the two weeks between your first and second ultrasound? Terror, but tons of hope.
Unless you are like me and realize that symptoms that were never that strong are waning. Bu still. There is hope.
Filed under Trying To Breed
I feel like a fucking Prom Queen
I feel like a fucking Prom Queen
After waiting all day, phone in hand, I somehow missed my phone call from the nurse. She is one of those people who chooses her words carefully. Not in the thoughful lawyerly kinda way. More like in a Slingblade kinda way.
So her message started out slowly. Wondering how I was feeling. Telling me it’s very important that I call the clinic back as soon as I get this msg.
Heart. In. well.. not stomach. I’m so freaking bloated and constipated theres not even room for food in there. Let’s just say my heart went someplace it should not be.
Then she said… let’s see… you have um… nine….. 2pn embryos and two 0pn ones that we will continue to watch. So… that’s a very good fertilization report.
Then she proceeded to give me the instructions, time and date for my transfer – Thursday at 8:45am. But of course, I couldn’t hear a thing over the sound of my heart restarting. I think at this point it had wrapped itself around my brain like a scared kitten clinging to a tree branch.
Filed under Trying To Breed
Sending Baby Juice and Best Wishes
Sending Baby Juice and Best Wishes
Today I packed up all my drugs and IVF paraphernalia and sent it off the Adele at Deliquent Eggs who was one of my earliest and bravest readers.
I wish her ALL the luck moving forward next month with IVF.
Very bitter sweet for me because next month is the month I was due. Hopefully it will be an ending for me… and a wonderful beginning for her.
Please send her all the sticky sparkly baby making vibes you can spare.
Filed under Trying To Breed
PickyBritches on Thinking Outside The Box Give AwayWe hide our BDSM lifestyle by doing things like using the miniblind handle as a whipper! You know, they just sort of pop right off the hook, don't make much noise, and sting like a mother fucker! Perfect! :D 
neeroc on Thinking Outside The Box Give AwayV (5) was with me when that IG pic came across my timeline. I told her they were earrings *g* 
QueerieBradshaw on Thinking Outside The Box Give AwayI wanted to post something about anal being outside of the box, but I couldn't come up with something funny enough. My life is thinking outside of the box. Including buying paddles with you at the place we aren't mentioning due to you not wanting to be sued. 
Mona Darling on A Rockin Parenting Fail.I got a new system. I'll post about how he out smarted me on that one soon. :-/