Tag Archives: freaking out
I’m a start up widow. My husband has been working on starting a company for the past year and about six weeks ago it took off. In that six weeks we have had three big important out of town weddings, a huge family reunion, a trip to Disneyland, Monkey fell and broke his collarbone, the frozen embryos transfer and the Mr has taken two week long work trips to NYC. He was in fact, gone when I did the FET. My mom, who is usually just 45 minutes away has been frantically getting her small urban farm ready so she can leave town for a month. She’s now gone.
I could go into more detail about house remodels and my own work, but I think you get the point. No rest for the wicked and I am obviously VERY wicked.
Depression. Not, unfortunately, the band.
Funny (ironic, not, unfortunately, hilarious) how one little thing can take you from “I think I’m doing OK” to sobbing. Or, in this case, two well timed things.
First. Aunt Flo arrived. My first real one post our final big fat fail of a final IVF. And she didn’t just arrive, she arrived with flair. A lot of flair. Spread out over 5 days. 5 days in which, like Ebenezer Scrooge I was visited by Every. Single. PMS Symptom. EVER. Usually it’s a day of cramps and bloating and the PMS trots and we move on with our lives. This time it was dragging out so badly that, had I ANY chance of being pregnant naturally, I might have actually pee’d on something.
Greasy skin. Check.
Broken out. Check. Check. Check and… all mighty god, lookie that! Check!
Boobs swollen and tender. Boy howdy! CHECK!
Emotional. *sob* check.
Cranky? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU LOOKING AT? um… check.
Last night after my session (which was a combination service and whipping session and in itself made me feel better) I treated myself to a cleansing evening at the local Korean Spa. I sat in the heat and watched the parade of local naked girls walk by and realized a couple things.
First. We women come in a LOT of shapes and sizes. Not many of them Playboy ready.
- The adorable curvy girls who mentioned being from the Pacific Northwest and sported HUGE dark bushes to prove it.
- The skinny ass lil tattoo’d and shaved (yes, down there. No landing strip, no nothing) Suicide Girl types.
- The HUGE chicks. Both tall and… well. Just big. Two of them. Taking up most the hot tub. Making me feel very very small. They were sorta loud too.
- The tiny little asian girls who sat in the water with their towel wrapped around them. Can’t tell you much of what was under there. It was tiny, and I’m thinking pretty firm.