I was going to skip this week because I was busy chasing Monkey through Disneyland and how weird could this weeks news be? Well? Weird. And just because I’m busy having the time of my life does not mean you should miss out on some dude decided to go for a ride on his unicycle. Naked.
I know there is a unicorn joke in there somewhere, but I’m too tired to find it.
First off, I was very glad to learn that it is NOT illegal to masturbate in a bathroom stall at work. Which is especially good news for some of my clients because I do occasionally make them do just that. (And continue reading down that link for some Savage Love input on 50 Shades of Grey.)
For those who really enjoy masturbating in public, this years Masturbate-a-Thon will be May 27th, in San Francisco. Of course. I’m simply dying to know who will be performing on that stage this year.
And Dear Abby tried to give sex advice. And … failed. Seriously. There is NOTHING there that suggests her step-son is a cross dresser. Simply nosy. Offer to by that poor boy lingerie and you will probably sever the relationship.
There was also something about a stripper, but seriously. Too tired. Disneyland with a toddler for three days tired. Will use the rest of nap time to actually nap myself.
Make your own Time cover with this template. I’m sure it won’t be as disturbing as mine, but you go ahead and try.