Spanking. It’s not just for perverts any more!

I'm not a mom yet (infertility) but I am a nanny. While I would never in a million years spank a child that is not mine I do recognize that every child is different and respond to different forms of discipline. For a lot of children time out works wonders. For others, taking away their favorite toy works. And for some, a quick smack on the rear gets the point across when nothing else works. A spanking (as long as not given out of anger and the child is not injured) is very effective and does not produce the negative behaviors that some child psychologists will tell you it does. You shouldn't feel bad about it at all.

I was spanked as a child as well. Not sure how serious it was though - I remember times when it hurt and I also remember a time when I hid a book in my undies and my dad didnt notice. Maybe it was a shin guard, but either way, he couldnt have been that serious about it. I need to read this in better detail. I have Toddlerina biting like a banshee and I just dont know what to do about it. When I put my face in hers to tell her How Very Wrong This Is, I am beaten about the brow. Sigh. It is breaking my heart.

I spanked my oldest once and it was not even that hard and ever since then (he is six now) the threat is worse then the act. Baby girl, desperate to get her to stay close to me and stop trying to run in to the street I spanked he on the bottom once and I am sure she could hardly feel it because of all the padding in her diaper but it worked. I have done it two times since and I am not thrilled - sigh 0- it works. Hopefully the threat will be enough... and soon! Brilliant post, btw...

I was spanked as a kid. Not frequently, but as a communicate-how-serious-whatever-I-had-done was. I remember being spanked when my brother and I broke my dad's watch by messing with it. I also remember my mom losing it once and swatting me as she chased me up the stairs, and it was clear to me that it was inappropriate. I think spanking can be used to teach kids about consequences - if they're doing something they know is bad, it provides a consequence. I don't think it should be overused, and I like very much the idea of talking about the transgression first.

No flames here! I was spanked as a child (I only remember 2-3 incidences, but those are vivid). We do not spank for pleasure, but I will certainly spank my kids if it seems appropriate. As already mentioned, the trick is to remember that there is a big difference between a spanking and a beating and if you threaten a spanking, you need to follow through. The reason I remember my spankings so vividly is because we TALKED about them extensively, what my transgression had been and why it was wrong and the meaning of the word "consequence". The actual hand-to-butt contact was only the brief culmination of anticipation and discussion, and always occurred at home, in private. The lead-up was MUCH more painful than the actual event.

I get spanked/whipped/paddled in the bedroom :) But I was only spanked once as a child. Mostly I was ignored. Which I think plays into my desire for that sort of attention as an adult. But no, I don't spank the boys. I used to, when we were part of a fundamentalist lifestyle many moons ago (in southern TX, moms walk around with wooden spoons sticking out of their expensive purses). And I regret it. But it's in the past, and my kids are older and can be reasoned with. I don't know how I'd do it if we had another baby. But we can't have another, so I don't have to worry about that. But yes, I loved the first part of this post! YUM! :) Thanks for sharing! xo

You're title cracks me up. I loved this post. I've always had way more in common with the attachment parents. You know how you can find the mom on the playground you'll have the most in common with because she's wearing a sling too and breast feeding her 2 year old? And yet, when the discipline issue comes up there's often an awkwardness, I can see it makes them uncomfortable and there's a subsequent cooling of the relationship, so to speak. Which I find fascinating actually, from a people watching standpoint. On the other hand my hard core parental discipline acquaintances are made uncomfortable by the idea that I co-sleep and breastfeed on demand. There is a middle way people. That to say I love the part in this story where you were expecting something entirely different than what you got. And I'm glad to help you not sink low in your chair anymore. If it helps, my 9 year old got in trouble in Sunday school last week for running so hard with his feet at a piece of plexiglass that he broke it in half. Awesomesauce, my kid is an accidental vandal. Time for another sit down.

OMG, you have the greatest stories. And hey you have nothing on me. My two year old got banned from the Mollie Stones childcare for tossing a table at a golden, flossy, female and equally two year old's head. For a month! I also used to spank mine when they thought it was funny to take off their seat belts as we drove down the freeway. Hysterical. I felt terrible but a quick sting on the thigh and they only did it once more to make sure I was paying attention. There's a time and a place, methinks.

I recall being spanked a few times, probably less than 5. But they made an impact for sure. I've spanked my child a couple of times and have mixed feelings about it. One time I don't think it even stung and she kind of looked at me like what are you doing? The other two times it stung and she was upset. Threatening a spanking is a joke, she'll say sure spank me. (she's 4) Those times I have spanked her I was kind of at my wits end, and I don't want to be in that place when I spank. So I'm not really sure what I think. How's that for a comment?

I applaud you. I grew up not only being spanked but slung around and occasionally punched (in the arms). I knew from day one that I was NEVER going to sling my child or punch them. But I also made the decision that I WAS going to spank. Why? I'll tell you why: I've never been arrested, I've never had a speeding ticket, I never drank before I was legal, never smoked before I was legal, I've never stolen anything, I've never been in a girl fight, I was never kicked out of school, and I've never been fired from a job. Some people call me a "goody-goody". I've led a life I'm proud of and when I look back at my youth I dont have a record to be ashamed of. I am a success story, as are my two siblings; one serves our country and has one year of college left, the other is a Social Worker and Pastor's Wife. We're good people. And we were good kids and it's because when I lied to my Daddy, he spanked me. When I talked back to my Mother, she spanked me. Maybe spanking isn't for everyone. But for this family it works. Because my 3 year old is one helluva well behaved little monster and I have every belief she will be one incredible woman.